An ode to 2015. (I'm lying, just a round up of my 2015)

January 11, 2016

Armed with a new laptop, I’m raring to get back into regular blogging. It seemed fitting that the first blog of the year be a review of my 2015. Reading this back, I’m worried I come across as egotistical, and if you feel like I do- I am genuinely very, very sorry. However, I would like to take this opportunity to say thank you to all my readers who have encouraged me to document my travels and who have shown me some wonderful support over the past year just by reading the dribble that I call a post. I do appreciate it!


This year has been perhaps the most emotional year of my twenty on this planet. There have been times where I’ve felt so happy that I was probably dancing down the street and others where I’ve felt that the light at the end of the tunnel went out a long time ago. My more cynical readers will perhaps be snickering to themselves right now, wondering what on earth I could have to worry about at my age- but let’s just say that everybody is fighting their own battles.


On a Global scale, we’ve watched the world unite and divide in reaction to the devastating terrorist attacks where we’ve allowed cowards to challenge our opinions and question our ideologies. We’ve seen innocent children wash upon the shores of the Mediterranean in a devastatingly unsuccessful pursuit of a better life, and still questioned whether it’s our responsibility. Without Googling, I’m finding it difficult to think of any uplifting news that happened over the past year. (Perhaps this is why I no longer read the news.)

On a personal level, I’ve achieved more than I believed possible for me. I’m so grateful to have had the opportunity to spend over six months of the year living abroad and developing both my French and Spanish. Of course, living away has meant that I’ve met some of the most incredible people who have taken me in and welcomed me as one of their own. From Dutch animatrices to Spanish doctors, Welsh sheep shaggers to dodgy scousers (they know who they are) everybody has made such a great impact on my life. My Mum always tells me how brave I am, but I don’t see it myself. Packing my bags and settling in a different country feels so natural to me, I don’t fear the change- I welcome it. Whilst it may be a big risk (we’ve all been stuck with boring fuckers for too long a time) I look forward to the new company that awaits and I suppose you could say I landed on my feet last year. 


F Scott Fitzgerald once wrote “It’s a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even smells the same. You realize what’s changed, is you.” For me, this has been ringing true for a while now. I had- without a doubt- a wonderful Christmas in Derby with my loved ones, but I was just scratching to get away from my small pocket of a hometown. Of course, I’m not looking down on Derby in the slightest (and it was brilliant to see my family again), it’s just there’s so much more to see, so much more adventure out there and coming home to a routine is incredibly confining. 2015 was the year that really made me realise that I want to travel more; I already have flights booked to Valencia and other random parts of Spain for the next three months and plans to go Inter-railing. I want to grab my aspirations with both hands in 2016 and just go for it.

Furthermore, I’ve been setting myself a target over the past few years to lose some weight, and finally, 2015 saw me lose four stone in six months. I’d like to go down the d-list celebrity route of announcing that it was all for health reasons, but it was also for vanity as I got sick of what I saw every time I looked in the mirror. For me, you can’t keep complaining about something if you haven’t tried to fix it. Without sounding like I’m selling my story to Pick Me Up, both my confidence and energy levels have definitely risen. I lost it all through a low carb lifestyle and more recently, I joined a gym in Spain. If somebody had told me in January that I’d be four stone lighter and a regular runner by the end of the year, I would’ve laughed in their face and helped myself to another slice of Dominoes.

I’m a firm believer of living for the moment. A blonde bombshell of a friend, Karan, once told me that she won’t be lying on her death bed wishing she’d spent more time putting in the hours at work instead of spending it having fun. Obviously it’s not a ground-breaking theory that’ll blow Aristotle out of the water, however it’s a small sentiment that reminds me not to take life too seriously. This year, I’ve watched too many loved-ones crumble under the pressures from work, university, society, etc. and this has served as an unfortunate reminder that life is short. It’s okay not to have a plan- ask me what I want to be when I’m older and I’ll still probably say a Princess. I (hopefully) graduate in 2017 with no idea of a career plan at the moment, however what I do know, is that the world is a big, vast and wonderful place with so many opportunities. As far as I’m concerned, you can’t control destiny and rightly so. This is something I intend to remember in 2016.

As I said in a recent Facebook status, 2015 was both the best year and worst year of my life. I’ve never experienced so much heart ache, and I never want to again. It’s easy to let grief and sadness overcome oneself and allow it to represent you as a person but it’s important not to let it. I’m smiling to myself as I write this on the train back to Orense- because I’m just so happy with where I am in life- my family are incredible, my friends are so supportive and I’m able to stick my fingers up to a terrible year. I look forward to a 2016 of happiness, good health and alcohol fuelled memories for all.

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